Published: July 27th 2021, 9:40:01 pm
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By far, texting has been the absolute best way to communicate without having to call the other person. Older generations and some young “old souls” complain that text takes away from the personalization of the message. You can’t really tell how the other person is truly feeling, they say. You could be texting the missus and ask if it is okay to go with the boys and she could text back, “Do whatever you want”. In your mind, she just gave you the okay but, in reality, she was scowling at her phone and was actually giving you the dirtiest look. However, I will give texting some credit. At least now, with unlimited texting, we can stay up all day and night talking to our friends at the click of the send button. Excited for class tomorrow because Ashton is going to finally tell off your first-period biology teacher? Go ahead and text the night away and your parents are none the wiser. Texting has also given us many shortcuts and new slang. Instead of typing, “hahaha”, we’ve come up with LOL, LMAO, ROFL, and so forth. I wouldn’t be surprised if all of our texts become jumbled up bunches of letters and it seems as if we are talking in code. You’re probably wondering why I’ve brought all this up. Well, it is because of a young man who texted the wrong person and had his life turned upside down.
This young man, let’s call him Brent, was at his friend’s house. Let’s call this friend John. Brent and John were the best of friends. They did everything together from having the same college classes to silly pranks. On Halloween, they decided to do some prank calls. You know, the typical, is your refrigerator running, what’s your favorite scary movie, and trying to get them to say the name Mike Hawk five times fast. When that started to get old, they decided to do something different, or well, different for the time. They decided to play Number Neighbors. Basically, you take your number and change one of the numbers. For example, if your phone number is 555-1234, you would text 555-1235, 555-1334, and so forth. John dared Brent to text his number neighbor and pretend he was a serial killer who was after his number neighbor. Without missing a beat, Brent did it. The texts went something like this.
Hello neighbor lmao
Uhm who is this?
Oh don’t worry who this is, just worry about the next few moments you have left to live lmao
Is this some sort of joke?
The only joke you’ll be telling is when you’re chocking lmao
I’m calling the police
They won’t make it in time. You can’t stop the number neighbor killer lmao
…
What? You have nothing to say? What are you scared or something lmao?
Why would I be afraid of you Brent? Lmao
Just then, Brent and John shot each other a look of pure fear. “What the hell man!” said Brent. “Dude don’t look at me! I didn’t know they would know who you are!” said John *text message*
What? You have nothing to say? What are you scared or something Brent, lmao?
“Dude, what the actual fuck is going on?” said Brent.” I have no goddamn idea dude, but, fuck this man!” said John. Brent and John decided that they would both end the game and ignore all the incoming texts coming from their actual crazed number neighbor. To get their minds off things, they decided to play some Halo ODST followed by cheesy horror movies with the trick or treat candy they were supposed to give out and wash it all down with chips and their body weight in Monster Energy Drinks. When they finally got off their sugar high, both of them went upstairs to Brent’s room and set up the sleeping bags. “That movie was so stupid,” Brent said while laughing. John agreed but, he looked a bit distressed. Mockingly, Brent exclaimed “What’s going on, John? You need some milk and cookies because you’re a-scared of the boogeyman? Haha pussy!”
(with irritation and a slight hint of fear) “Fuck you, Brent, I’m still worried about that person that texted us. How would they know your name? When a random number texts me, it always shows their number. It isn’t like we forgot to star 67 them and the caller ID showed or something and even then. Dude, this is seriously messed up”.
(trying to confidently/douche-bag-ly calm the situation) “Look man, just because they were my number neighbor doesn’t mean they’re my actual neighbor. Come on man. And hey, if they try anything, we are on the football team. They’re probably some troll off of 4chan or something. Look, you’re probably just having sugar withdrawal. Go downstairs and get the rest of the Halloween candy, or better yet, why don’t you stay down there and drink my mom’s wine. Then when you want to be a man, come back upstairs so we can get some rest for tomorrow. I can’t wait to see Jenny and I know you’re all jazzed up about seeing her sister.”
John rolled his eyes, but, still went downstairs. While he was down there, Brent was texting his other friends or WhatsApp. He was texting his buddy in South America and they were just shooting the breeze on what they did for their Halloween. As always, Brent always ended his texts with lmao. Things suddenly got strange. Out of nowhere, Brent heard a laugh he never heard before coming from downstairs.
*Laugh quietly*
Brent shook it off and went back to texting his friend back. Suddenly the laughing got a little louder
*Laugh slightly louder*
Brent knew that definitely wasn’t the tv or John. Brent walked out and stood at the top of the stairs. He tried to call for him many times, but no response. Brent then made it all the way to the bottom and when he turned the corner to go into the kitchen, his heart nearly sank. There John was, lying shirtless and dead in the middle of the kitchen floor. His skin was pale and his eyes were as wide as dinner plates. His jaw had been broken and his mouth was so agape, you could probably fit both of your fists in. Carved into his stomach was, LMAO. (On the brink of tears and shaking), “N..No No No No John. What the FUCK man!” Suddenly, a rather tall, large, man appeared from the pantry. He was wearing all black including his ski mask.
(in a sinister tone) “Hello there number neighbor. I’m glad we are finally getting to meet face to face. I just wanted to tell you in person that it is never okay to prank call people pretending to be a serial killer. It gives us a bad name and reputation. [pause] Why aren’t you laughing? What happened to L-M-A-O.? Aww come on, don’t tell me the big, tough, prankster is actually just a big baby??”
Brent could do nothing but stand there and stare with his fists clenched. The stranger left shortly after and stared through Brent’s soul as he did with the most devious smile on his face. Brent finally snapped out of it and called the police and then John’s parents. Brent was never the same after that night. He checked himself into group therapy for those that lost a loved one the week before Thanksgiving and Brent got himself a “fellow fighter partner” they called it, basically a person that checks on you. The strange thing was, his partner did not show up for therapy, and Brent was just told to call or text him when Brent got home. Brent did just that. He introduced himself and told his story and so did the stranger. They suddenly hit it off and for a brief moment, Brent became his old self. He started sending his texts with LMAO again. His partner then texted him, “Hey, I don’t wanna come off as odd or anything, but, can we call? I just want to know what you sound like. I know it sounds weird but what if we run into each other in public and I want to buy you a burger or something”? Brent happily agreed and called the number. The phone rang,
“Hello, Brent, my number neighbor. I look forward to seeing you soon.”
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