I am a stupid fuck hole.
It took me a minute to put this together, but I wanted to let you guys know what's been happening with me.
I found my first master on fetlife and ended up being his bitch for about 6.5 years. He fucked my ass 3-4 times a day. He trained my ass every day. I loved our dynamic, and I loved him.
At a certain point, things just weren't working as well for us anymore. We started losing whatever we had that had made things special. We were both cold and grumpy with each other too often. So, we separated.
I was single for almost a year. I spent that year going from guy to guy, fucking guys from bars, fucking fans from online, generally drinking too much, and being a drunk little anal whore..
Without a master to push me, my anal training started to suffer. Eventually, I reached out to have my old master train my ass again. I had never really stopped missing being with him and being used by him. He agreed to own me in order to train me again.
I committed, but it never really became a relationship like it was before. I was just his anal bitch. The sex stuff was still really good, but the chemistry wasn't there. This arrangement didn't last long.
One of my friends from work introduced me to a guy. We started messaging just as friends. At a certain point, we developed a lot of chemistry. After running into each other a few different times, we started dating. I had been upfront with him about my history and all of my kinks. He liked fucking my ass, but he didn't like some of my fetishes or me being online. I really liked him, so I gave it all up.
Things went really well at first. I was happy, but the longer it went on, the more I craved being someone's bitch again. I craved being owned. I craved showing off on here and talking to everyone about how my journey was going as an anal slut. I craved being anal fuckmeat. Sometimes I was able to put it out of my head, but it wasn't long before I started thinking about it all the time.
