Published: May 2nd 2025, 2:00:07 pm
The legal part of my mind was screaming at me after we dropped off Lord Sylas.
I’d committed all the crimes.
Smuggling. Trafficking weapons. Sleeping in a public area. Indecorous skulking. Bribery. Theft. Breaking and entering. Kidnapping. Arson. Impersonation. Resisting arrest. Espionage. Obstruction of Justice. Petty Treason. Because he was a [Lord], not a [King].
Arguments could be made for Sedition and Rebellion, but I doubted they’d stick.
The stupidest one of them all? The one I’d only realized much later?
Public Indecency. Apparently, the gloves thing in Winterhold was far more serious than we’d expected, and Iona hadn’t stopped teasing me about it yet. She gasped as I walked into the room, one hand going to her heart.
“My word! Elaine! I can see your hands! They give me such lustful thoughts!” Iona pretended to vigorously fan herself. I snorted at the joke.
“My shadow gives you lustful thoughts.” I said. Iona eyed me up and down with a grin, then eyed my shadow with undisguised lust. I rolled my eyes, flopping down next to her.
“What’s got you down?” She asked.
“Adventuring. We’re doing all the things I’ve lambasted [Adventurers] for.” I complained. “I’ve been corrupted. I think I want to move onto the next thing.”
“Being a [Guard]?” Iona teased. “Catch enough misbehaving [Adventurers] to make up for all the ‘crimes’ you’ve committed?”
“We’ve committed.” I corrected. “And yeah, why not? My dad was one, I’ve always admired them. I’ve done some guard duty here and there, plus various investigations, but why not formalize it? Do it for real?”
Iona shrugged.
“Sure. If we’re going to stick to a place for a while, I’m going to try out being a [Priestess]. Do we want to do this in Orthus?”
“Hmmm… it would be easy to do there.” I conceded. “But I worry we might have too many ties, if that makes sense? Too many awkward questions? ‘Elaine, aren’t you the healer-witch? Why are you a guard? Iona, did you stop being a Valkyrie?’ Plus, Raccoon is going to laugh at me, and the chain of command is going to be all sorts of awkward. She’d be senior to me.”
“There’s also the size of the place.” Iona mused. “Orthus has been growing nicely, but could we get the best experience in what we want to try there? Do we want the small town feel, or a big city? I practically was the [Priestess] for Orthus in all but name for decades, I personally want to try a big city. You okay with that?”
“Sure.” I readily agreed. “Mare City?”
The town the former Sixth Legion had settled in had exploded in size over the years, and I had a bet with Sara that it’d end up being Exterreri’s new capital some day.
“We haven’t seen Katerina nearly enough.” Iona agreed. “Plus, that’s an easy in.”
“And we’re stationary, Auri can finally try her bakery speedrun challenge.” I said.
“Or join you as a guard. Get another hat in her collection.” Iona said.
“Well, what are we waiting for?” I said. “Let’s do it!”
=================
Unlike when we’d moved on from the School, there were no deep entanglements to undo. No community we’d sunk into. The biggest thing we had to do was send off letters to our family - Fenrir, Auri, Artemis, Nina, Sara, and the rest - letting them know what we were doing and where we’d be. The utter lack of roots was another minor mark against [Adventurers] in my mind, although having walked a few miles in their shoes I did understand them better.
I think my biggest issue was the culture and isolation. [Adventurers] loved to talk up their lifestyle, and tried to out-masochism each other. Staying at the rattiest taverns was seen as a badge of honor. People competed to see how long they could camp out in the wilderness, in increasingly hostile and unlikely conditions.
Critically, it was almost entirely ‘self contained’, with no mention of other job prospects or careers. People never mentioned joining the [Guards] as an alternative. Never mentioned joining the local country’s military forces. The one time I heard of it happening, it was to a great amount of jeering and taunts.
I didn’t know if the answer was to actively recruit people more or what, but it was clear the moment people got sucked into the [Adventurer’s] world, it was like they were isolated from everyone else. Food for thought.
Leaving for Mare City was easy enough, and we took a quick detour past Orthus.
“Oooh, did they turn our cottage into a shrine?” I asked Iona with disbelief. The rest of the mango orchard I’d left behind was enclosed on the grounds. She squinted down.
“They did.” She sounded delighted. “That had to be someone from Nippon-Koku’s work or influence.”
Orthus was on the Sea of Stars, of which most of Nippon-Koku was on the other side.
Mischief danced in my eyes.
“Miracle time?” I proposed to Iona.
“How is it that I’m the [Paladin], and you do more miracles than me?” She half-complained, half-teased.
“You are the miracle. It just usually involves blades, blood, and bemoaning.” I teased right back. “I’d take the consistent, low-level miracle of you over the rare, flashy ‘miracles’ that I do.”
Iona blew a raspberry, then got a canny look in her eye.
“Only if they’ve left out a mango for the local demigoddess.” She teased.
“I’m sure they’ve left appropriate offerings for the kami.” I said.
Iona flinched and looked up.
“Too far.” She muttered to me.
“Shit, yeah.” I quickly agreed. “Sorry!” I shouted out, a bit louder, to anyone that might be listening to us chatting above the clouds.
Whoops, Ciriel, sorry, I might’ve done a little blasphemy. I screwed up! I’m sorry! Anyway, I’m about to do another miracle in your name. Very much your name. Yup.
I got a vaguely amused and exasperated sense back, but no words. Kinda like a divine eye roll.
“Ready for all the pomp and ceremony?” Iona asked. I narrowed my eyes, scanning the shrine carefully.
“They’ve got a mango there!” I cried out in triumph. “Alright, let’s goo!”
Suggesting I was a goddess was blasphemy, and the gods didn’t like it terribly much. Borrowing angel iconography was completely fine. Halo out, wings out, and glowing with blinding Radiance, I slowly descended down from the ‘heavens’ onto Orthus, briefly snapping my healing out to encompass the town, along with the rest of the county. Iona dashed down next to me, using my blinding light to hide in plain sight.
I went slowly enough that people could see me, and tell their friends and family about the event - they’d have to be blind, face-down in a pillow to miss me in the first place - but not quite so much that I’d get mobbed. I wanted to make a show, not remind myself of everyone we’d - damnit, that had to be one of the Nix’s, the jawline was distinctive. Raccoon was pulled into a corner by Iona, embracing her in a hug. We couldn’t always be around, but we’d always say hi.
This is for you. I silently dedicated the moment to Ciriel.
Thank you. She replied back. It cost me nothing, and it was something nice I could give to a friend. Why not?
I landed at the top of the shrine, where one girl was nearly trembling in a bow, not daring to lift her head. I shrugged to myself and decided to go with the classics.
“Be not afraid. Ciriel, the Goddess of Healing watches over you all.” I said, then murdered the solemnity of the moment by stealing - no, liberating - no, accepting the offering as tribute, there we go - the three perfect mangos in the dish. I barely managed to restrain myself from voraciously and sloppily eating them all on the spot. Instead, the moment the first brave person’s foot touched the bottom step, I rocketed back up into the sky, halo, wings, and golden light all. I glanced down to see what Iona was doing, and patted the side of Fenrir’s neck.
“Looks like we’re going to spend a few days here. Ready to shrink down and say hi to Raccoon?”
The wyvern growled his assent, and we spent the next week catching up with Raccoon.
==================
We found Mare City easily enough, rented the cheapest place possible to have a mailing address before opening [Manor] inside, then split off on our respective job hunts. Iona, forever brimming with confidence, had no doubt that she’d be leading rites by the end of the day.
I didn’t think it’d be quite that easy myself.
Adventurer’s Guild? Sign on the dotted line, have some vague amount of physical fitness, excellent, we’re sending you after the dreaded man-eating manticore of the forbidden peaks.
Signing up to be a [Guard]? Significantly harder. In some ways better, in some ways worse. The [Guards] had to know me to let me in, and my options were to hang around them for a few years before I was known enough that they’d take a chance on me, or find an alternative way in.
It wasn’t a problem for most people. Either an existing connection would make an introduction, or the children that looked up to the [Guards] would be happily welcomed into their ranks. A stranger, from out of town? I was totally on board with them waiting a reasonable period of time to make sure said stranger would be a respectable member of society.
Except I was impatient, and I did have my own connections. Which ended up with me in the [Captain of the Guard’s] office three days later.
“Hi!” I cheerfully waved to the gruff man as I entered his office. He sighed around the stacks of paperwork.
“Hello. Take a seat. Who are you, how did you get this appointment, and what do you want? I can spare eight minutes for you.” He asked, cutting directly to the heart of the matter. I sat down straight-backed on the chair, and immediately rattled off my answers.
“I’m Elaine, but usually go by Dawn to prevent confusion. I asked [Legata] Katerina nicely. I’d like to join the [Guard] for a decade or two.” I promptly answered. One eyebrow went up.
“With your class, level, and to be blunt, your size, you think you can be a [Guard]?” He asked.
“Ah.” I said. “One moment.”
I slipped off the ring hiding my level, and put it on the desk. I got a pair of narrowed eyes for my efforts.
“Honesty and integrity are keystones of being the city guards.” He lectured me. “Intentionally concealing matters from the public is not how we do things.”
I spread my hands helplessly.
“Check my level again?” I suggested, only to see him sputter in disbelief. I quickly slipped the ring back on. “And that’s why I’m wearing a ring.”
“Why are you here? For real?” He asked. “You could join the Rangers with that level.”
I laughed and teleported out my Sentinel badge. The captain went pale.
“I’m a bored Immortal, looking to try every aspect of life. I’ve been a Ranger, a Sentinel, and worked with the Legions. I haven’t been a [Guard], although my dad was one growing up. I want to try it out for a few decades, then move on with my life.”
He was shaking his head slowly.
“Gods grant me strength.” He muttered to himself. “Will you be able to follow orders you dislike? Will you be able to do scutwork? Can you lower yourself far enough to do what needs to be done?”
All reasonable questions, in my book.
“Assuming they don’t clash against preexisting oaths nor my personal code of ethics, yes.”
He leaned forward, elbows on his desk, then smiled at me.
“Given your prior claims, you know what question I’m going to ask next.” He said.
“I will heal people that need it.” I answered. “And I can’t commit harm against people not threatening me or a patient of mine.”
I got a long stare at that, before the captain sighed.
“Alright. Talk with Custodus, let him know you’re a new recruit. Don’t make me regret this, on your father’s memory.”
The unexpected reference got me, piercing through all my defenses. I involuntarily teared up, and saluted the man.
“You won’t.” I promised.