Published: January 4th 2019, 9:37:42 pm
I don't know why I've been afraid to write this post. I've been putting off because I was depressed and then I was busy and then I was sick, but now that I'm actually sitting down to write this post...I feel anxious.
I was so anxious I procrastinated by learning how instagram stories work. I kind of get it now.
Anyway, I think I'm being weird about this because this was a VERY long year. I scrolled through my year of posts and once I got a few months back I shouted “OH MY GOD THE SCRUBS SHOW WAS THIS YEAR?!?!?!?” And, despite how long that year was, I feel like I didn't accomplish much. I only performed 20 times. I only published 2 articles, one of which has been taken down. I didn't volunteer that much. I got a bunch more stuff into my Redbubble store, but I didn't sell that much.
There are only three finished projects I feel really PROUD of; My weirdo Dali Duet, my duet with Maggie and the costume I made for the Florence and the Machine show. All of which are woefully under-documented.
But I think most of the stuff I accomplished just wasn't easy to quantify. I was an adult a lot. I don’t much care for it, but I’m proud of myself for doing it. I bought a house and moved and have spent a large chunk of the year fighting the mold monster. I navigated some complicated relationship logistics and mostly did pretty well with them. I have been Responsible a lot more than normal and, again, I'm not crazy about it. But it's better than feeling helpless.
I learned a lot. I've been starting most of my morning by watching classes on skillshare and I love it. I've been getting comfortable with Lightroom, Photoshop, and Illustrator. I’m learning more about watercolor painting, illustration, and photography. I certainly haven’t mastered any of them, but I’m getting better.
I've also given a lot more of my attention to visual art than I have in a long time. I'm often frustrated that I'm not as good at it as I want to be, but I think I need to respect that just the act of doing it and learning and pushing myself is important.
I've also soaked up a LOT of inspiration. I went to the Burning Man exhibit and the portrait gallery in DC, The David Bowie Is exhibit at the brooklyn museum, The Catholic Imagination fashion exhibit at the Met, and The Maker Faire. I've already used some inspiration from The Maker Faire in an events pitch! I also watched a LOT of great horror movies. I don't know if/how that'll filter into my work but I really hope it does.
I was going to talk about my plans for next year and my resolutions and how I'd like to improve your patreon experience but I've yammered on enough so I'll post about that later.