hedonisticfeedee

An Ode to Food, My Executioner

Published: June 21st 2019, 11:57:32 am

We are all born in a similar fashion, 

but we are born under different circumstances. 

No one knew what I’d turn out to be, 

when I took my first gasp of breath.

My body was a blank slate then,

no one prepared for when my youth would taint my future because of you.

I just wanted to be loved and nurtured, 

but my parents didn’t have time for me.

You were a catalyst for change within me,

something that exuded a reason worth living. 

You loved me and nurtured me when no one else would, 

and my heart soared for you more than it ever should.

I got attached because you picked up the broken glass of my life, 

you helped me find my purpose.

I grew up... and out...and out even further,

our bond developed strongly over my transient life. 

You seduced me with your aroma and beauty,

the lies and deceit were all part of your plan.

You took my innocence away in every sense of the word,

making me reliant and head over cankles for you. 

The closest thing to sex or a lover that I’ve ever had, 

tiny nutrient orgasms that drove my brain mad.

I became a slave to you, 

always pleading for more as you took control.

When I tried to quit you the memories of good times flooded my fat-filled brain,

sopping up my tears when I was bullied.

Now our love is toxic,

I still love you, but you don’t love me.

My body is abused with red stretch marks,

grotesque and disfigured lymphedema legs.

The fluid-stained thighs chapped raw,

The weight on my legs, belly, and chest keeping me anchored to a soiled mattress.

I’m riddled with diabetes and the scars of a quadruple bypass, 

debilitated in a compact world of four walls.

Whenever I thought I could quit you there was backup,

Your squad of Depression, Anxiety, and Disease battering my body.

It’s too late for salvation,

As I descend into a hopeless abyss my doctor calls obesity. 

No longer my knight in shining armor,

your sword pierces my lungs and heart.

You are hell-bent on being my executioner,

I clutch my chest and gasp my last breath.

All because I couldn’t stop eating,

I loved you to death.