Published: October 18th 2024, 5:59:10 pm
Severus took measured steps as he closed in on the infirmary with a basket full of ingredients in his hand. Each step he took became difficult as he felt like he was being weighed down by tons of iron on his legs and shoulders. The weight of the act he was about to commit was not lost on him. His hands shook uncharacteristically as he turned a corner, and his eyes fell on the doors to the infirmary.
‘Ten more steps, and I’ll be a murderer once more.’ Severus thought.
He remembered the first time he had killed. It was on a raid in a muggle village under the orders of the Dark Lord. It was an orientation all fresh Death Eater recruits had gone through. It was right after he graduated from Hogwarts. He had foolishly chosen to join the Death Eaters, swayed by the honeyed words of Lucius Malfoy and some of his fellow Slytherins.
He could still remember that cold night when he and three other new recruits led by Walden Macnair wreaked havoc in that muggle village. The events of the night, which he had tried so hard to suppress all these years, resurfaced as he stood before the infirmary. The recruits were assigned a muggle home to wipe out its inhabitants. This was the ritual to be granted the mark of the Dark Lord.
Severus could still hear the screams and desperate begging in his ears of muggle families his fellow recruits tortured. They were innocent souls who had never harmed anyone from the Wizarding world. Those muggles had never even known the wizarding world existed. Their only experience of magic was probably one from some street performer juggling some balls or a muggle magic show using smoke and mirrors. He had known that then, but he had watched dispassionately as his fellow recruits burned, mutilated and tortured those poor people. Even the children were not spared under the watchful eyes of Macnair.
When it was finally his time, he was faced with an ageing couple and their grandson. Those three pairs of fearful eyes burned a hole in his mind. No matter how proficient he was in the Mind Arts, those eyes remained capable of shattering his defences. He liked to think he was far more merciful than his fellow recruits by granting his three victims the mercy of a quick painless death using the Killing Curse.
Whatever reasons and arguments he made in support of his actions to make it seem like kindness, he knew he had committed a worse deed than anyone else that night. He alone had not felt anything that night. He was plain indifferent and considered the pain of others as insignificant before his goals. It was this indifference he considered a greater crime than the act of murder.
It took him the death of Lily to truly understand the horrors he had committed in his rage and hatred.
For a time, he blamed his Death Eaters companions for his actions. He convinced himself he wouldn’t have acted the way he did if not for the Death Eaters or the Dark Lord.
But Severus knew better now. With age came more wisdom, and he knew now his actions were his own and no one else was to blame. The fruits of those actions were his own to bear, no matter how much he wished otherwise. It was for this reason he had never sought to build a family of his own. He knew he was unworthy of such a life when he had helped snuff out many families and loved ones of so many people.
‘Now, I’m to become a murderer once more.’ Severus thought grimly.
Taking a deep breath, he cleared his mind and regained his bearings. Severus took measured steps forward, counting each step along the way. He tucked the basket under his arm against his body while his free hand pushed the doors open.
“Ah, Severus! Why did it take so long? Did you get the ingredients I asked for?” Slughorn rushed to his side and took the basket off his hands.
“Yes, everything you need is right there.” Severus said curtly while his onyx eyes fell on the prone form of Dumbledore.
“Hmm, yes… yes… I think this will do.” Slughorn hummed and hawed as the Potion Master sifted through the contents of the basket.
To his relief, Severus saw Dumbledore’s eyes gain a flash of recognition when they settled on him. The potion he and Slughorn had administered to Dumbledore had brought the headmaster to consciousness. However, despite regaining awareness and opening his eyes, Dumbledore refused to utter a single word.
They theorised that whatever elixir the Dark Lord concocted still affected Dumbledore’s mind.
“Severus.” Dumbledore rasped.
He stared at the headmaster with wide eyes. He was not the only one to do so. Madam Pomfrey stopped what she was doing and rushed to Dumbledore’s side. Slughorn, who was about to leave for his potion lab, stopped at the doorway and walked back to Dumbledore's side.
“Albus! Are you okay, old friend?” Slughorn fussed over the prone form of the headmaster.
“Severus… please…” Dumbledore muttered again, raising his cursed hand towards him.
Severus gulped at the request being made. He shut his eyes for a brief moment to ready himself for what he was about to do. When he opened his eyes, he gave a curt nod to Dumbledore, assuring that he’d keep his word to the man.
‘For the greater good.’ Severus thought as he swiftly took his wand into his right hand and pointed it straight at Madam Pomfrey.
“Expelliarmus.”
Madam Pomfrey’s wand immediately was wrenched from her hand and safely landed in his waiting hand.
“Flipendo. Incarcerous.”
He followed up with quick spells which knocked away Madam Pomfrey and bound her with a rope.
“Severus! What’re you doin…?” Slughorn shouted, reaching for his wand.
“Levicorpus. Expelliarmus.”
The old Potion Master was held upside down by his ankles while Severus neatly snatched Slughorn’s wand. With two other able-bodied occupants of the infirmary bound, Severus turned his attention back to Dumbledore. He didn’t stun them because they needed to witness this event.
Severus turned his wand straight at the prone form of Dumbledore while Madam Pomfrey and Slughorn cried and shouted at him. He didn’t know whether it was his imagination, but he saw a brief smile on Dumbledore’s face. He liked to think Dumbledore was at peace and happy to suffer no longer.
With that self-consolation, Severus gathered his will and magic.
“Avada Kedavra.”
The poisonous green-coloured spell hissed out of the tip of his wand and struck Dumbledore’s chest. Just like that, life was snuffed out from Dumbledore’s body.
“No! Albus!” Madam Pomfrey wailed with tears streaming down her cheeks.
“What have you done?” Slughorn cried, his grey eyes glistering with tears.
“I have done what must be done.” Severus said coldly before sweeping out of the infirmary with his cloak billowing behind him.
Severus walked right past the many sculptures and warm corridors of Hogwarts. In some ways, he felt wistful as he passed by the familiar spaces of the castle, which had served as his home for more than a decade. The castle was also his escape from a dark childhood. He couldn’t help but remember all the fond memories tied to the castle as he strolled out of the castle into the grounds. He paused midstep, cast his eyes on the castle one last time and seared the image into his mind.
But the beauty and tranquillity he felt when he watched the castle didn’t stop him from leaving behind the mark of the Dark Lord.
“Morsmordre.”
A colossal skull comprised of specks of green stars with a snake protruding from the skull appeared on the night sky over Hogwarts.
Severus turned away from the castle and never looked back as he walked towards the edge of the wards before apparating away.
*****
Harry lay awake in bed with the sleeping potion remaining untouched in his trunk. The notice-me-not ward surrounding his bed gave him the needed discretion as his wand’s tip glowed with light while observing Snape using the Marauder’s Map. He sat up in his bed when Albus Dumbledore’s name disappeared from the infirmary. At the same time, Snape’s name and Madam Pomfrey's and Professor Slughorn’s names also remained on the map.
“Dumbledore is dead.” Harry muttered as he stared at the map for a long moment.
Strangely enough, he felt nothing different as the knowledge of Dumbledore’s passing set in.
His eyes traced Snape, making his escape from the infirmary, and Harry frowned at the name on the map. He was tempted to go after Snape but he held off the urge and remained on his bed. While battling Snape was undoubtedly exciting, he held off such baser urges in favour of allowing Snape to dig his own grave. He assumed Madam Pomfrey and Professor Slughorn witnessed Snape’s crime since they were present in the infirmary.
However, Harry was slightly worried their memories were tampered with by Snape, who remains an accomplished Occulmens. The urge to interfere was great, but Harry remained rooted in the spot. He watched Snape exit the castle into the grounds and walk somewhat close to the Gryffindor tower.
Harry quickly took his Omnioculars from his trunk and moved to the window. He opened the glass window and let the cold air into the room. His eyes quickly fell on the illuminated Dark Mark in the sky, where an illuminated snake could be seen extending out of a light-green skull. Using the Omnioculars, he even zoomed in on Snape, who was rushing towards the edge of the wards after placing the Dark Mark in the night sky.
Harry snorted before turning away from the window. His dormmates were out like light despite the chilly air entering their dorm room. He closed the window and returned to bed with his focus back on the Marauder’s Map. When nothing happened for a while, he tucked the map safely beneath his pillow and went to sleep.
The following day, Harry was not surprised to find the castle flooded with aurors. A gloomy raincloud hung over everyone as word had already spread across Hogwarts. The portraits and the ghosts were mostly responsible. The Fat Lady was the one to break the news in Gryffindor Tower and he supposed the other portraits were mouthing off to students about Dumbledore’s death.
So, before anything else that day, Harry got the summons to McGonagall’s office. The entire Gryffindor House was in mourning while he set out from the tower straight for McGonagall’s office. When he finally arrived at the office, he saw McGonagall sporting baggy eyes, probably from lack of sleep.
“Take a seat, Mr Potter. I assume you have heard what happened to Headmaster Dumbledore.”
“I have, Professor.” Harry nodded as he sat across from her on the other side of her table.
“I need to know what happened last night.”
“I already told you…” Harry started, but he was abruptly cut off.
“Enough with the secrets!” McGonagall said sharply, “I just found out a man I have known for the better part of my life has been murdered by one of our fellow professors. This happens right after whatever you and Albus were doing last night. I need to know the truth.”
Harry stared at McGonagall for a long moment. He wanted to blow her off just like she had done to him in the past, but he liked to think he was not as petty and dismissive as she was. Besides, keeping secrets from people who were important enough in the battle against the Dark Lord was Dumbledore’s idiotic style, not his.
Harry let out the breath he was holding.
“I suppose you deserve to know why Dumbledore did what he did and what we were hunting. But first, I believe the Order also needs to know this. They need to know why Dumbledore believed Voldemort never died that night and why he could’ve never destroyed Voldemort for good despite his great power. I also think Minister Bones needs to know.”
McGonagall looked like she swallowed a lemon, but she acquiesced.
Harry was temporarily left off the hook and allowed to have breakfast with his friends in the Great Hall. The hall was deathly silent, unlike most days with a dark cloud hanging over them. The banners of Hogwarts were all black instead of the red and gold of Gryffindor banner as they had won the House Cup.
“Snape! It had to be that bloody traitor. We always knew that slimy git was a traitorous snake.” Ron muttered moodily, poking dejectedly at his pork chops with the silverware.
“Snape must’ve taken revenge for Malfoy.” Seamus whispered, “I think Malfoy was his godson.”
“If that was the case, then Snape would’ve gone after Harry. Merlin knows that git wouldn’t pass up an opportunity to go after Harry if he could help it.” Ron shook his head before his face pale a little bit, “It was definitely on the orders of You-Know-Who.”
“I can’t believe Professor Snape would do this.” Hermione said with trembling lips.
Harry and most of the table stared incredulously at her.
“You still calling that traitor Professor!” Ron hissed furiously, lips pulling back in a sneer, “He is no professor… the blood Death Eater.”
“Yeah. He had it out for anyone decent in Hogwarts. Dumbledore should’ve never allowed that man in the castle.” Ron muttered darkly, glaring at the Slytherin table as if he could see Snape in the rival house.
It was largely a pointless exercise, considering that the staff had gone to certain lengths to shield Slytherin House from any aspersions cast on them because of Snape’s actions. Towards that end, all robes, ties and sweaters were black today, taking the colour of mourning instead of the distinct colours of the four Houses.
McGonagall and the other Hogwarts staff seated themselves at the high table, and all whispered conversations came to a halt when Professor McGonagall stood up to address the hall. Her expression was grave but composed as her brown eyes fell on the hall.
“Students,” her voice thick with emotion as her magnified voice reached them all, “I regret to inform you that our beloved Headmaster, Professor Albus Dumbledore, passed away last night.”
The Great Hall dimmed further as the weight of her words sank in.
Harry could see many faces in the Great Hall turned pale, and many eyes welled up with tears. Despite what he thought about Dumbledore, many young and old wizards and witches looked up to Dumbledore. Despite everything, Dumbledore was a great wizard worthy of becoming a yardstick for young witches and wizards.
“He was a great man, a light in the darkest hours of our world and a mentor, a friend and family to all of us.” McGonagall continued, her eyes glistering, “Though we grieve his passing, we must also remember to stand together in the face of darkness, to be brave and to stand by for what is right even at personal cost.”
McGonagall paused to gather herself before continuing.
“Professor Dumbledore has shown these qualities throughout his life and we must strive to emulate such qualities. We will honour his memory by continuing to support one another and upholding the values Professor Dumbledore held sacred.”
“In the days to come, let us support each other, and together, we shall overcome the dark days ahead. The funeral…” McGonagall paused to compose herself, “…shall be held tomorrow morning, after which you’ll be boarding the Hogwarts Express from the Hogsmeade station.”
The hall remained silent save for the sound of muffled sobs.
Harry’s eyes sifted through the sorrowful faces in the Great Hall until finally locked with a pair of blue eyes in the Slytherin table.
‘Wait for me.’ Daphne mouthed.
Harry nodded discreetly.
He quickly finished the breakfast and rose from his table when he noticed Daphne rose from her table.
“Harry.” Daphne reached out and took his hand in hers, “How’re you doing?”
“Not bad.” said Harry, intertwining his fingers with hers.
“Is it true that… you know… Snape?” Daphne asked quietly as they walked past the other students.
“Yep.”
“How did he… you know… do it?” Daphne asked, glancing at him intently.
Harry made sure there was no one around before he answered.
“I didn’t see it, but I tracked them last night through the Map. It was in the infirmary, and I suspect Slughorn and Pomfrey witnessed the deed.” Harry whispered.
“I see. You know what this means, right? The Dark Lord will start asserting himself harshly, and I suspect he’ll gain more followers.” said Daphne while leaning closer to his side and looking at him with concern shining in her eyes.
Harry was not wholly bothered by what Voldemort would do with Dumbledore’s death. The Ministry was fighting the war with a good attrition record so far. While Dumbledore’s death was a morale blow to the Ministry, the facts on the ground were not going to shift too much. The Death Eaters were a diminished organisation, with much of its cream of the crop dead. The new recruits were not as experienced to wage a war against a bolstered Ministry.
“One death is not going to change too much. Voldemort will understand that soon enough.” Harry pressed a kiss to the side of her head.
“I am concerned. There are some in Slytherin making some noise emboldened by Dumbledore’s death.” said Daphne as they sat on a bench outside the castle under the cover of a tree.
“Hmm… I think a visit is in order.”
“That might not be a good idea. With everything that happened…”
“I’ll take permission from Slughorn. He won’t deny me.”
“Be careful. Tension is high.” Daphne warned him, her grip on his arm tightening a fraction.
“Whenever there is a power vacuum, there is bound to be tension. All the hyenas will come out smelling blood and an easy prey, but…” Harry wrapped his arm around Daphne’s shoulder and watched Hagrid walk towards his cabin, “…it’s the lion’s duty to maintain the order forcefully.”
“You’re getting way worse with these kinds of talks.” Daphne rolled her eyes, “Just leave my housemates intact after whatever you do. I have one more year in Hogwarts, and so do you.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Harry said, his eyes lighting up with mirth.