candy

follow up announcement - doing better, what august will look like

Published: July 29th 2022, 10:41:42 am

hi!!!

a lot of people have reached out to me really concerned with my wellbeing, and i wanted to say im really sorry for worrying anyone !!!!!!

im doing better, im starting to lose less time and im moving around more. i have a convention im going to that i absolutely cant skip because one of my best friends is a con chair and a lot of precious people to me that i havent seen in years are going, so im trying my hardest to focus on healing asap so i can vlog at that properly. im sorry if thats kind of upsetting when ive been letting my projects fall apart and havent really been able to get on track again, i promise its not me not valuing my obligations and my promises and im going to be back on track asap for content creating too. cons arent really that fun for me anymore with how bad my health is, they still are and i still enjoy them but as you can see by my vlogs i just kind of chill and spend a ton of money to do it in a hotel room. 

i told some more of my friends about how im doing bad and im talking a lot more people, having more help with stuff, and just generally getting a lot of love. for context, ive had a really rough childhood and have had catatonic depression for almost a decade now, ive been hospitalized for it before and its been a thing ive been fighting almost my entire sentient life, but it is a battle because it isnt something easy to treat. its come in waves and about once a year my brain just gives up and makes me a zombie LOL,,,,,,, 

zombies are cute though right ????

anyways, about the plans for next month. i had a very good idea of making status bars for costumes and updating them weekly/monthly, like a completion bar for projects. i really want this account to be more for documenting my hard work and ive let that fall to the wayside because im too afraid of people being disappointed in me focusing on that lol. im officially 2.5 months behind on photoshoots and need to catch up and get organized !!! hardcore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i might make a little status thing too so you guys can know how im doing and why im not responding/posting a lot/etc, like an rpg profile lol. 

i might start making blog posts about content creation, like ive worked on a lot of really cool mini parts of longterm cosplays and havent done my photoshoot yet, i want to share them with you for the people who enjoy that. 

also, i have a boat load of dms to answer again and im trying to think of a way this can be avoided while interacting a lot with you guys. im trying to beef up my discord and be there more so you guys can talk there and get chatting with me out of the way but so many of you send me incredibly kind long messages i struggle to respond to because im so emotionally messy lately, i thrive best in casual environments and need to overcome that or think of something cooler. maybe monthly streams on here?

im already doing my q and a video (which, again, so sorry i havent done yet!!!) so monthly q and a streams seem over the top? or maybe i can stream while im working on something and you guys can talk to me? idk, im thinking of ideas on more ways to connect and make a stronger community, if you guys have any please let me know!!! i do talk a lot in my discord now, at least three to four times a day, and vc a lot there too (more than anywhere else for me at least lol) so please do join and share some memes or some cute twitter art you found or something !!! 

i have some more stuff to post still for the month, i know i keep saying that but i seriously have like 5 mountains of stuff i have to get through, put my logo on, and upload - the mental weight of it has just been a lot since looking at myself is upsetting.

thank you all for being here, i mean it, i wouldnt of gotten through this month without a lot of the kindness i received. i would be doing a lot worse if i didnt have you. please consider being here again with me in the future! 

i love you!!!