Published: November 3rd 2022, 11:49:25 pm
Hey, fam! A little update on my “plans going forward” discussion from earlier.
So, I came up for air today and opened my project tracker, removed the filters, and evaluated my remaining workload for the old commissions I took.
And immediately had to regulate a boatload of anxiety because I still have *Nineteen Full-Color, Detailed Commissions to Go.*
Heck.
So, here’s the thing. If I manage to find a job, part time or otherwise, that has decent pay and ISN‘T transphobic as fuck, I will probably be able to get one, maybe two, of these done a week and not much else. If I can’t find a decent job, then I’m going to have to keep taking on sketch and flat color commissions to make ends meet. Which means I will STILL likely only get one or two done a week.
Heck.
So, timeline wise, that puts us around March or April before enough wiggle room opens up for me to do much else besides commissions, outside of warmups and the occassional keep-Molly-sane personal drawing. And I am very grumpled about this.
I have some really, outstandingly exciting and fun ideas I want to start up here on Patreon. I desperately want to move away from personal commissions and do more interactive, patron-driven stuff that will help me flex my comic-making and character-designing skills. I want to build towards unique art projects that I can make into art books, merch, you name it - and right now, instead, I get to practice emotionally regulating while not being able to do the thing I want.
And that’s fine.
Fact is, despite how intense that is and how frustrating the six-ish months ahead are, things could be a whole fuckton worse. I know folks who are working 40+ hours in body-destroying service work who are basically surviving thanks to breathing more weed than air and wondering if they’ll make it to 50. If I’m working overtime drawing other people’s big-titty OCs and not getting out much for half a year, well, I can deal. It’ll wear me out, but goddamn, Molly, count your blessings.
(I share all this because I am also committed to dropping the bullshit rigid behaviors art school and martial arts taught me. I’m through putting on a show and trying to pretend I’m some perfectly put-togehter ultra-productive rockstar 24/7, that instagram crap can fuck right off. I’m a human being and I strugglebus every goddamn day, and I don’t want someone looking at me and thinking “Gee, I can’t do art like that, I’m not nearly as productive and put-together as her!”
I want people to think “Goddamn if that traumatized gremlin can still draw bomb-ass titties, I bet I can too!”
So, yeah. It’s commissions all the way down till March/April. I’ll be updating every week with the commissions (that I can share) as they get done, and re-opening for Sketch and Flat Color commissions very soon after I knock out a fairly big-ticket job that I have to finish to get paid for.
TO MAKE UP FOR THAT BOGUS BUMMER I’m going to post here every goddamn day with WIPS, sketches, whatever I worked on recently. I’ll put em on Discord too. If it’s a project I can’t share fully, I’ll do cropped teasers instead. Just, SOMETHING to reward you lovely people for having my back. It’s the least I can do.
Thanks for reading, pervs. Take care of yourselves.