Hello! A little update about my life and everything that is ..
Published: March 2nd 2022, 3:14:21 am
Hello! A little update about my life and everything that is happening.
I know my life looks at the moment like a massive holiday but I feel like we all know at this point that what we put on the internet is never a full picture of our lives. My life has been having massive ups and downs at the moment. Which means massive amount of happiness but also massive amount of shit. I feel like when I post something into my story people see the nice picture but don't read the caption.
I sprained my ankle 9 days ago which was second day after my friend came to visit me. He came for 12 days and sprained ankle isn't fun. It's not something that heals in couple days. I had two days rest but I felt the pressure to do something afterwards. No pressure from him but pressure from myself to do all the things I planned and promised we were gonna do whilst he's here. Getting to Costa Rica and Costa Rica itself is not cheap. It might look like India or Indonesia but apart of the landscape they have nothing else in common.
I had to go to a doctor with my ankle today even though I thought it was healing but I woke up in the middle of the night with a burning pain of not just my ankle but the whole foot and in the morning I could barely walk again. I paid $80 just for a doctor to tell me that it's probably not broken or no ligaments were torn because I can move my foot but he can't be sure unless I get an xray which I could only get in San Jose which is 5 hour bus drive away.
I also almost drowned couple days ago. I got caught in a tide too far away from the shore, I couldn't reach the ground anymore and I tried to swim but just wouldn't move. Then big waves started to come and I got hit over and over again losing my strength. I was screaming and calling for help but no one heard me. I honestly thought I wasn't gonna make it. I don't think I've ever been so scared for my life before. I did make it out though. I slowly started to be able to reach the ground and when my friend finally realised that something was wrong he came and helped me the last bits.
Anyway my internet is pretty shit at the moment and even the video I posted today took like 40 mins to upload. I pull out so much content daily in the last month or so and I decided not to feel pressured to do that anymore as I know I do lots of good quality content. I had a tarot card reading tonight and I cried during most of it but one thing that has been said is that I need to rest when I feel like I need to rest. Which is not what I'm doing at all. I guess I'm tired of not doing any better compare of when I started doing adult content more than a year ago. My paycheck isn't getting any higher. I'm not getting any more popular and I'm kinda getting tired.
I hate being asked for more content. I hate being asked for making content with other people. I understand that. But I hate that people don't understand how much does it take. This is "ADULT" content. You need consent, so much paperwork being signed, you need to be with someone you're comfortable with and they are comfortable with you. You don't just go and ask your friends to do a scene with you. Because those people could have their futures destroyed by doing that. Doesn't matter I'm putting this behind a pay wall. It will always comes out. Screenshots, teasers, full videos etc.
Anyway this is just a reminder that I'm just a person. My life isn't one big holiday, I'm not having sex 24/7 and I have other struggles just as everyone else does. I post content at my own pace and when I feel like it resonate with me and my mood.