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Me: Dude, I know we’re best friends but I’m getting kinda sick of you testing out your different kinks on me. First I was your slave, now you wanna sniff my pits?
Best F: Yea? You like being a sub, I’ve heard it through the walls. You being on your knees and worshipping cock like it owns you. Why shouldn’t I get a turn?
Me: WHY SHOULDN’T I GET A TURN?!? I always have to do as you ask because you’re bigger than me. It’s not fair.
Best F: Well, I’m bigger and I’m badder so get those arms up and let me see that pit hair.
Me: O.. okay.
Best F: Fuck they stink good. You’re gonna stand here still that musk got me nice ‘nd har… wait. W… WHY am I getting smaller!?! What did you do?
Me: I didn’t do anything. You did this to yourself. Getting off to my scent while treating me like dirt. Consequences. It’s my turn to feel like a God.
Best F: I’m sorry! Please bring me back up. When’s it even gonna stop??
Me: Whenever you stop getting off to me… which by your search history will be never you micro-freak. My cocks already bigger than your arm. Serve my rancid soles and maybe you’ll become a pet instead of an microscopic speck.